If a happy pill without side effects existed, I wouldn't take it.

Because what's the point of feigned happiness?

Such Great Heights

Note: The only reason I titled this post "Such Great Heights" is because I'm listening to this song...except it's the cover by Iron & Wine. If you haven't heard it and are curious, click here. If you've heard The Postal Service version, which is the original, I'm proud of you.

Today, I'm going to blog about one of my favorite classes--English 261, also known as American Literature. I have this class with Dr. Vivian, who is also a writer in addition to being an English professor. Today's class was one of my favorites, I feel. 

and I'm going to explain why.

We were supposed to read this play The Gimmick by Dael Orlandersmith for class today, which is about two children, Alexis and Jimmy, who are growing up in Harlem and trying to follow their dreams. 

Jimmy wants to be as great of a painter as Picasso, while Alexis wants to be a great writer. 

Anyway: both of them want to go to Paris so they can make their dreams fully come true. Dr. Vivian basically described it as a "city of aspiration" for them. Then, he asked us what our city of aspiration was. 

One girl in the class, a Theater/English Double Major, said that her city of aspiration was Chicago, since the people there are so artsy and she just felt at home there. A guy in the class, who's a fraternity member and a musician, said his city was London, since a lot of musicians are coming from there these days. It's true, when you really think about it.

Ed Sheeran got his start in London. (And it's funny, because the guy who wants to go to London is also a ginger, much like Ed is.)

EDWARD. Enough said.

Anyway, how does this relate to me? Well...I've been looking for my city of aspiration for a while now, I just didn't know it. 

My first thought was Memphis, TN, since Memphis is really big for music as well...or it used to be. The first time I went and stayed in Memphis was in January of 2012 and I basically loved it. I even got to venture to the Memphis Drum Shop, which has the biggest cymbal room in the world inside of it! I basically geeked out for a good half hour about the place and dragged my non-percussion friends, Amy and Ashley, inside. 

Luckily, like the good friends that they are, they didn't get annoyed or be like "Erin, we have to get back to the hostel soon so make this snappy." Plus, they took a picture of me being all excited and stuff. 

SO FREAKIN EXCITED.

After I left Memphis, I just really really wanted to go back. Even know, I would seriously up and leave, stay in the hostel we stayed at on the trip, and stay there...forever. 

It would be totally legit.

Unfortunately, I haven't been able to return since but when I do, it'll be exciting and I'll likely blog about it or talk about it non-stop. 

Anyway, class today really rekindled this thought of "What if I just went to Memphis and followed one of my dreams that has sort of fallen away from me?" and part of me thinks that this happened for a reason. 

Then, there's the part of me that's all like "ERIN, SNAP OUT OF IT. YOU HAVE COLLEGE TO TEND TO RIGHT NOW."

and that's sort of the unfortunate reality I've found myself in recently.

and I'd be lying if I said it didn't suck sometimes. 

and I'd also be lying if I said I can live without Alma and just leave right now.

But that's not all. After the whole discussion about the city of aspiration, we got on the subject of 'self-invention' and what people have to do, in order to invent themselves. 

I'm not really sure what to say about that right now, since it's a complicated process.

What I do know from my experience is that I haven't fully invented myself yet. In these few years that I've been in college, I've learned so much about myself and I've grown so much. 

However, there is a lot that I have yet to accept about myself and one of these days, I'll get there. It's just going to take time, patience, and more growth on my part. 

Anyway, I'm going to wrap this up. 

Peace out. 

I still have a blog...I think

This is basically a "sorry for being a terrible blogger" post.

It's a problem.

College has this way of taking over my life, making me crazy in the best and worst ways, and keeping me away from the simple task of writing out my thoughts and hitting the "publish" button.

But if I love writing so much, why don't I blog more?

That's a question that I don't have an answer for.

However, I've had a lot of ideas lately for writing so perhaps, that's a good sign. I suppose I'll make a little bullet list for those who are curious as to what my life has consisted of lately.

• my fantastic trip to the southwest/Mexico
• caffeine
• listening to my Pandora station
• Phi Sigma Sigma
• ALL the homework for research methods for my psychology major
• visiting my elder
• wanting to go back to Mexico/the southwest
• preparing for my trip to England 
• many, many trips to Braveheart's
• sleep deprivation
• wearing my Baja/"drug rug" for days on end
• not doing my laundry
• seeing old friends
• making new friends
• looking for my silver lining
• dressing up every Monday to make myself feel FABULOUS ;D

and...let's throw a picture in here. because why not.

yes, that's me. in Alma College tartan sunglasses. beat that swag.

kbye. I promise I'll start blogging more and they'll be posts of fantastic proportions.